


My First Kakagai Week 2020

by ExtremeExhaustion



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gai being a good influence, Gai is an amazing support person, Hatake Kakashi Is Trying, Hatake Kakashi is traumatized and depressed, KakaGai Week 2020, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:47:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28317729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExtremeExhaustion/pseuds/ExtremeExhaustion
Summary: This is my first time writing Kakagai. I hope you enjoy as I write for this years Kakagai prompts.*Warnings and ratings are prone to change**Trigger warnings will be put at the beginning notes
Relationships: Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Hatake Kakashi, Hatake Kakashi/Maito Gai | Might Guy
Kudos: 41
Collections: KakaGai Week 2020 entries





	1. Prompt: Burden

**Author's Note:**

> Rating: T  
> Warning: Graphic description of depression which may be triggering

Hatake Kakashi’s life had never been easy. It was full of difficulty from the start when he only had one parent who struggled to take care of him to all the deaths he endured as a teen to his days in the ANBU. He had the very vague hope that maybe, just maybe life would lighten a bit once he was put into a regular jonin status. What he got instead was brat team after brat team. None of whom passed his initial test. Maybe Kakashi was being a bit harsh on them. However, any thoughts like that vanished rapidly as memories of Obito and Rin flashed through his mind. His team would work together. They had to protect each other. And he had to keep his distance.

  


Anyone Kakashi grew to care about ended up dead. It was a fact. So, to keep others safe, he didn’t allow himself to get close to another human. He aggressively pushed others away and sabotaged relationships when he could. It was for the good of the others. Kakashi could survive being alone, but he wasn’t sure if he could survive another lost. He didn’t need others. He didn’t deserve that closeness. There was one person that his usual methods didn’t seem to work on: Maito Gai. That stubborn, cheerful goon relentlessly kept trying to maintain a relationship with the Copy Ninja. Nothing seemed to work at keeping Gai away. Not threats, not avoidance, not harsh words, not even pleading worked. Kakashi still didn’t understand it.

  


The two jonin were in a tentative romantic relationship that started after one horrid ANBU mission which lasted a whole month. Where Kakashi had collapsed into his apartment, bloody and dazed, only to be met with the sight of a bright green jumpsuit instead of the floor. Gai had held him. Helped him clean up and undress. Always keeping his gaze away when the cloth mask came off. It was that night that his mental fog and overwhelming emotions allowed Kakashi to ask what had been bugging him for so long. Why? Why was Gai here? Why was Gai taking care of him when all he did was push the other away? The other shinobi simply responded that to him Kakashi was worth the effort. That he loved the ANBU soldier and always would despite any attempts to push him away.

  


Kakashi has vague memories of crying that night. Of trying to desperately convince Gai that he wasn’t worth any of it. The Blue Beast had dug his heels in and seemed to have a response to everything. Am I really worth the pain? Well, of course he was. Loving me is dangerous. Since when did danger scare Gai? I’m not easy to love. Love isn’t meant to be easy. In the end, Kakashi ended up kissing Gai in a search to assure himself that their feelings were really shared. That the other ninja loved him as much as he loved Gai. True to his word, acting lovey wasn’t easy for Kakashi. He shied away from loud displays of affection. This didn’t seem to bother his new partner at all.

  


Gai simply added his loving gestures into their rivalry to keep an impression that this was just how Gai was and that nothing else was going on. Kakashi appreciated it so much more than he’d say out loud. Now, this didn’t mean that the Copy Ninja was completely detached from affection. When the two were alone, he would practically drape himself over Gai. To seek that comfort in physical ways. In a way that roused deep memories of when his father was still alive. Sakumo had shown his affection the most through touch as well. Kakashi didn’t go any further though out of that deep rooted fear that plagued his mind. He hadn’t even told Gai that he loved him. It left a sour feeling of guilt to rot in his stomach.

  


It was just so hard for Kakashi. He was built up to destroy, to kill, to maim. He wasn’t sure how to love. And there were oh so many days where his mind went very dark. When the nightmares got relentless, when he felt his hand itch with the feeling of sticky blood, when he felt worthless, when all he wanted to do was lay on his bed all day, when his mind drifted often, and when he could vividly see all his dead loved ones while a cruel voice whispered about how he could’ve prevented it. When he became the most uncertain that a person like him could even love at all. It was ironic. Kakashi had been praised for his mind throughout his childhood.

  


That he was a pure genius, a prodigy, and his intellect was his greatest strength. Now, his mind was one of his greatest weaknesses. That dark shadow of complete despair pressed down hard on his back to the point that he felt exhausted most of the time. Gai was gentler during these days. A little less loud, but still insistent on getting Kakashi to go out and do something or to relax from overworking. He made way-too-spicy dinners and spent as much time as he could around his partner. It was probably one of the few things keeping Kakashi’s head above water. From drowning in his mind. The light source blotting out the darkness that hung around him. Kakashi made sure to at least try to show his appreciation for the support.

  


The main way being listening to Gai’s long rants about mindless topics with the most frequent being Gai’s group of brats and how good it would be for Kakashi to get his own team. He’d watch his self-proclaimed rival animatedly talk about how having a group of students would give him more of a purpose and would make him feel better with a disbelieving look. However, when the white-haired jonin met his newest group of bratlings, Gai’s words came to mind. Even more so when they were the first group to pass his test. Kakashi watched his new genin walked ahead of him with a hidden half-smile. Naruto and Sasuke where arguing while Sakura yelled at Naruto from the side. Maybe these brats would find a way into his heart. It would increase his burden of responsibility, no doubt, but oddly Kakashi didn’t really mind.


	2. Prompt: Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What flowers mean to Kakashi and Gai

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Warnings: None

Sakumo darted a hand out quickly to grab the back of his son’s shirt to keep the toddler from landing face first into the river. He sighed in relief when his grip kept little Kakashi upright. The ninja tugged the boy away from the banks and towards himself, “What were you doing, pup? You could’ve fallen in.” Kakashi proudly presented a small bunch of white flowers clutched in his tiny fist, “Dada, I got f’owers.” Sakumo kneeled on the ground so he could still keep eye level with his son while also putting the toddler down. He smiled, “Yes, you do. Are they for me?” Kakashi nodded eagerly before toddling forward to press them into his father’s waiting hand. He pointed at his dad’s head, “They white like ‘our hair.” Sakumo hummed in fake thought, “They certainly are white like my hair. And your hair too.”

  


His smile widened at his son’s cute giggle when he ruffled the boy’s hair. The man put the flowers securely into his pack before lifting Kakashi into his arms with a grunt, “C’mon, pup, let’s head back home.” Thick flora brushed against the White Fang’s legs as he walked back to the Hatake Compound. He hummed a small wordless tune. Kakashi rested his head against his dad’s shoulder and hummed along. By the time they reached their home, the toddler was half-asleep. Sakumo smiled at the peaceful look on his son’s face. It wasn’t often that the little boy allowed himself to have fun and be happy. He rubbed the boy’s back lightly, “Let’s get you to bed.” Kakashi sat up with a pout, “I’m n’t sleepy.”

  


Sakumo laughed lightly, “Sure you aren’t, pup.” He sat down on some wood near a window. Shifting so his son was nestled against his chest instead of his neck, the jonin rocked back and forth slowly while resuming his humming. The moonlight made their white hair glow in the dark. Sakumo caressed Kakashi’s cheek with his thumb while the rest stayed in soft spiky hair. He hugged his child to his body. The warmth from the man’s body combined with the quiet melody soothed the toddler to sleep. Sakumo carefully stood up and made his way to put Kakashi down in his bed before going to his bedroom. He pulled the flowers out of his pack. He pressed them into a book filled with other flowers and wrote down a small description next to it. It was a book that contained flowers picked during small moments in life like this.

  


Dai struggled a bit to keep up with his energetic boy. Gai loved to move as much as he could even with his limited mobility skills. He picked flowers from the meadow with great zeal then presented them to Dai with a big cheery grin. The flowers often came with chunks of dirt clinging to the roots. Dai gave a boisterous laugh when Gai trotted up to him covered in mud, damp, and clutching bright yellow flowers in his hands. He easily picked the young boy up, “Let’s get you cleaned up, buddy.” His own clothes became filthy from picking up his son. The trek back to their house didn’t take long. Gai was distracted by the flowers still clutched in his hands.

  


Giving his son a bath was about as difficult as chasing him down. Still, Dai kept a bright smile and a laugh in his voice as the toddler splashed happily in the water. Gai squirmed away from his father’s washing to play instead. A large hand tugged him back, “How’d you get so dirty anyways?” Gai giggled, “I tripped.” Ah, of course. The little boy fell down often with how much he moved about. It never stopped him though. Gai would just get straight back up and continue on his way. Adding more truth to the story, his limbs had a few bruises and cuts. Dai covered up the cuts with bandages after finishing up with the bath. He carried the little boy and swung him around playfully into the dining room.

  


The yellow flowers were put into a makeshift vase on the table. Their home was a bit small, but it was enough for the single dad and his son. Gai’s face brightened when he saw his specially picked flowers on display. He pointed, “It’s yellow like your scarf!” Dai puffed up while starting to cook, “They are! An amazing observation, Gai!” The boy giggled happily at the praise. The bright flora made the room feel so much brighter along with the smell of curry being cooked in air. Gai kept trying to reach out to tug at the flowers to smell them and babbled on about the adventure he went on to get them. Dai nodded along until dinner was finished. They ate together with their moods lightened by the beautiful flowers sitting in the vase.

  


Well, this was it. Maito Gai’s rival was to be the next Hokage. That meant that they wouldn’t be able to have challenges anymore. It also meant he’d have to find another way to take Kakashi on discreet dates. So, he needed to come up with one final challenge. Something extreme, something that would show off their rivalry, something that would make the tension fall from his lover’s shoulders, something that would make that melodic laugh ring out freely. He hummed in thought as he walked down the street. He also needed to think of a gift. Some kind of way to congratulate Kakashi on getting such a high honor. A flash of bright yellow caught his eye. Gai paused to take a better look.

  


A flower shop with a bouquet of those same yellow flowers that he picked all those years ago. Granted, Gai didn’t actually remember this. All he knew was that those flowers gave him a good, happy feeling. That made them the perfect gift. With his signature grin on his face, the green jonin went inside to make his purchase. As he did so, a plan slowly started formulating in his head. A big race around the village. Starting at the front gates and ending at the mountain where the carvings of the Hokages were. The finishing line would be set up with a ribbon and all. Gai walked out, bouquet in hand, thinking about how he’d get it all set up in time. “Hey, Gai-sensei!” With a bright grin, Gai rushed over to greet his student. Lee would be up to help.

  


Kakashi wasn’t sure what to think. He thought this was just a regular old challenge that Gai beefed up a bit to distract him from his buzzing thoughts. That idea vanished when a bunch of beautiful and nicely smelling yellow flowers were being offered to him by Gai who gave a half-sighed congrats. He blinked a few times, “No, this is nothing to be congratulated for.” A hint of laughter made his voice warp a bit. His lover could be so silly sometimes. Then, Gai turned to look at him with a serious expression, “You’re the Hokage. Congratulations.” Kakashi couldn’t help a small gasp and flinched back. What was Gai planning on doing? An anxious part of his mind wondered if this was going to be a breakup or something worse.

  


Gai continued on, “When you become Hokage, you probably won’t be able to accept my challenges anymore. I wanted to put you to the test one last time before it became official. Thank you, Kakashi.” The Copy Ninja resisted the urge to shake his head fondly. Oh, Gai. He was being really silly this time. Kakashi accepted the flowers with careful hands, “Thanks, but this isn’t the last time. We’ll always be rivals and that will never change.” He felt his mouth quirk up into a grin when Gai let out a ‘huh’ with a shocked expression on his face, “Listen Gai. I truly find it reassuring having you there and I hope you always will be.” Kakashi couldn’t help doing his usual close-eyed smile.

  


It wasn’t often that he spoke this honestly. But Gai needed to know that Kakashi still wanted him around even as Hokage. Of course, both Gai and Lee started to bawl at his words. It was something the jonin had long gotten used to. Later on, when the pair got the chance to be alone, Kakashi made sure to show his appreciation more. He put the flower in the nicest vase he had then dragged Gai onto the couch for some cuddles. The white-haired ninja clung to his lover, “Please don’t ever leave me, turtle.” Gai happily gave the other a firm bear hug, “I love you, Kakashi.” The bright yellow flowers bobbed up and down seemingly in joy of the display of affection. Kakashi glanced at them idly. Maybe he should add one of those flowers to that little black book his father had kept that sat in a desk drawer.


	3. Prompt: Dusk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi does legit care about his team, but depression and trauma makes it hard for him to show it. He breaks down and Gai is there to be his support.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Warnings: Mild description of depressive thoughts

This wasn’t how he wanted the day to go. Kakashi stared tiredly at the three bratlings that decided to break into his apartment. Today was supposed to be a date night with Gai who’d be coming over later. He didn’t need a group of bratty pups invading any part of his personal life. Especially not the romantic part of his life. Sasuke had thankfully chosen to just sit down on the couch and sulk. Sakura had pulled out one of the few novels that was in the house and sat down to read it. Naruto was being the troublesome one rummaging around in all of his stuff. Kakashi didn’t have many personal belongings, but this needed to stop. He quickly walked over and scooped up the blonde genin, “Why are you three here?”

  


That question caused an abrupt mood change. The three went quiet and didn’t meet his eye. This made Kakashi wrack his sleep-deprived brain to figure out what was the motive. They had all come at different times, so it wasn’t a let’s-go-annoy-sensei plan. Sasuke had shifted from crossing his arms to almost hugging himself. Sakura fidgeted with the pages of the book and the jonin swore he could see an odd wetness in her eyes. Naruto immediately clung to the arm that was currently holding him up. All Kakashi got from this was that his little bratlings were upset about something. He didn’t know how much help he could be. The man was close to a mental breakdown himself at the moment.

  


It was why he wanted to have a date tonight. Gai’s presence was always grounding and calming. With a soft huff, Kakashi walked over to the couch, scooping Sakura up in his other arm, and put the two down on the couch. Pulling up a chair, the sensei sat in front of the three. He put his chin on his hand while his elbow rested on his leg, “Ok, Naruto, you talk first. Why did you come here?” The blonde boy shrunk under his question, “I, uhhh…I didn’t want to be home alone, ya know.” There was something else wrong, but that was good enough for now. He shifted his gaze over to Sakura, “Alright, Sakura, why are you here?” The girl put her legs up to hug them, “I just didn’t want to go home tonight.”

  


Right, Sakura’s parents were a bit odd. He didn’t push it any further. His gaze drifted to the last brat in his group of genin. Sasuke pressed into the couch and was actually shaking a bit. He sat quietly for a few moments. The dark-haired student had bags under his eyes, “Well, Sasuke?” Sasuke lowered his head, “…nightmare…” It was muttered out so lowly that only Kakashi’s sharp hearing could catch. To his fellow genin, Sasuke said nothing. Kakashi nodded slowly, “Ok…” He didn’t want to push any of them for more information. He didn’t have the mental energy to deal with all the details. What could he do to help? As exhausted as he was, the jonin wasn’t about to kick the three out. He rubbed his hand against his face and through his hair.

  


He felt oddly exposed. In casual clothes and no headband, he looked more like the depressed mess he was instead of a steady sensei. Kakashi lifted his head before an idea came to mind. If he had more mental clarity, he would’ve realized that it was something his father used to do with him as a kid when he was upset. In this state, however, it was just what was coming to mind right now. Kakashi stood up from the chair before waving his arm, “C’mon, pups.” The three looked up at him in surprise but followed. They walked into the small bedroom of the apartment. He threw some extra pillows and blankets onto the bed before sitting down with his back propped up against the back board. He made a come-here gesture to his pups.

  


Naruto was the first to rush forward. He squirmed under the blankets and shifted until he could rest his head in his sensei’s lap. Sakura approached much more slowly. She hesitantly crawled onto her sensei’s other side and settled down with her head pressed against Kakashi’s side when he tugged her closer. Sasuke was the last to approach. He stood awkwardly while rubbing his arms. Uncertainty was written on his face. All it took was Kakashi waving him over to break that uncertainty. He walked over and seemed a bit unsure where to go. This caused Kakashi to reach out and pull him to be next to Naruto. Sasuke hesitantly accepted it when Naruto tugged him into a half-hug. Kakashi made sure to have a hand on all his pups.

  


He rocked back and forth, the motion being a little awkward with the position, and started to hum a wordless tune. It was a song that was from so long ago. Something Kakashi hadn’t heard in years but still remained locked in his mind. A song he would hum to himself in an attempt to find some form of comfort. He could feel his pups sinking into him and relaxing. He ran his hand through his pups’ hair to further soothe them. No one said a word when all three started to cry at varying intensities. Naruto started to let out shaky sobs, Sakura wept softly, and Sasuke had silent tears running down his face. Kakashi paused in his humming to mumble out reassurances to his precious pups.

  


Eventually, all three fell asleep in the arms of their sensei. Kakashi felt calmer than he had all day. It helped to focus on someone else’s needs instead of his own. He looked down at his pups with a heavy sigh. Rubbing away tear tracks, his heart hurt in his chest. They were all so broken. A damaged sensei and his damaged team. His couldn’t help a small sad smile. As bratty as his pups could be, Kakashi couldn’t deny that he had grown fairly attached to the group. He felt guilty that he didn’t have much to offer in terms of help. He was too damaged himself. He couldn’t even show his affection for the team properly. Love, even non-romantic kinds, were so hard for him.

  


Kakashi wasn’t sure when he fell asleep too. He was awoken by a gentle hand running through his hair. He blinked his eyes open and was met with his lover smiling down at him. Gai looked down at the genin still pressed against their sensei, “Do you think you can get up, my love?” Kakashi nodded and carefully extracted himself from his bed. The two jonin walked settled onto the desk near the bed and the window. Streaks of pink, orange, and dark purple raced across the sky. Kakashi sighed quietly as he looked up at the darkening sky. Gai bumped their shoulders together. There was a slightly smug look on his face, “So, what do you think about having a genin team?” Kakashi glanced back to his bed. His team was slowly shifting to cling to each other now that their sensei had left.

  


He closed his eyes tiredly, “Gai, I…I don’t think I can do this. I care about them. But I can’t show them that. How can I help them when I’m too distracted fighting my own mind? There’s so much of me in Sauske it’s terrifying. He’s going to do something fucked up and I don’t think I can stop it.” Gai’s smugness fell away and he put his hands on his lover’s shoulders, “Hey, hey, don’t talk like that. I know it’s going to be rough. And there will be things that you can’t control. But you will do what you can because you care. And that’s enough. You’re enough, my love.” He wiped some tears away before tugging down the mask and holding his face in his hands. Kakashi’s face was stunning even red with tears.

  


What wasn’t pretty was the insecurity written all over his face. Gai shifted to press sweet chaste kisses all over his lover’s face. Kakashi squeezed his eyes shut and clung to his partner’s wrists. The Blue Beast pressed a kiss to those lovely lips before pressing their foreheads together, “It’s another day tomorrow. You’ll be ok and so will your students. Dusk is a time for rest. Dawn is a time for new chances.” Kakashi let out a shaky laugh. Gai’s language could get so flowery and poetic it was a little ridiculous. He inhaled and exhaled deeply before opening his normal eye, “Stay with me, please.” Gai nodded and the two left the bedroom to go onto the couch.

  


The Blue Beast laid down before the Copy Ninja flopped down on top of him. Kakashi felt himself start to drift off to sleep again with the steady sound of Gai’s heartbeat thundering under his ear and his breath lifting his head up and down. Before he could fully drift off, Kakashi mumbled out, “You should write a poem or something. You’d be good at it.” Gai laughed a bit before hugging his love to his chest, “I will if you want me too, Kakashi.” With that last note, Kakashi drifted off to sleep. The next time he woke up, he was back in bed with his pups and a small poem written on a piece of paper sat on his desk.


	4. Prompt: Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi had been lost many times in his life. Luckily, Gai is there to help him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T  
> Warnings: Graphic description of panic attack, compulsions, and suicidal thoughts

What was his dad doing? Kakashi scrunched up his face in confusion. He had gotten out of bed to get some water and his father was just laying down in the hall. He slowly walked forward towards where his dad was laying on the floor. “Dad? Dad, why are you laying on the floor?” He approached from his dad’s back as lightning lit up the room. The strong scent of blood overwhelmed his naturally strong sense of smell. His heart dropped into his stomach, “Dad…are you hurt?” He shuffled forward until he could touch his father. Why wasn’t Dad responding? Kakashi fell onto his knees and started shaking his dad. Tears began to well up and roll down his face. “Dad, Dad, c’mon, this isn’t funny. Dad!” The child began to shake, “Dad! Dad, Dad…Dad……” He fell forward and hugged the still body. “Please…don’t go.” The little boy had no clue what to do.

  


Kakashi sat on his bed. He clung to his knees with tears rolling down his face. His one eye was covered in bandages. Obito was dead…he was gone. He let his head fall onto his knees. The new scar throbbed painfully. His chest ached as he thought back to what happened. What he could’ve done. Obito died protecting the team. Died protecting him. Kakashi clenched his jaw to keep a mournful shriek from escaping. They had finally started to get along. To understand each other a little. Now he was gone. Now Kakashi had a promise to keep. He’d protect Rin with his life. No matter what, he wouldn’t let Rin die. He couldn’t. She was one of the few people he had left. But he wasn’t sure how he’d do that.

  


No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Kakashi cried as he desperately grabbed Rin’s shoulder to keep her up. Her blood was hot and sticky on his hand as his Chidori punctured her chest. Rin stared blankly back at him. Blood dripped from her mouth as she mumbled out his name, “Ka…ka…shi…” The teen woke with a start. Gasping through his mask that felt too thick and suffocating. His whole body shook as he panted. Kakashi shakily stood up and went to the sink. He scrubbed his hand relentlessly. He could feel it. The feeling of hot, sticky blood coating his hand again. Kakashi whimpered as his chest felt like it was crushing in on itself. He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think about anything except washing his hand, “It won’t come off…it won’t come off…it won’t come off.” The young ninja was at a complete loss of what else he could do.

  


Pressing his back against the door, Kakashi slowly slid down to sit on the floor. Eyes staring dully ahead at the practically empty bedroom. His ANBU mask stayed clutched in his hands. Tears fell down his face. He felt so numb. Minato-sensei and Kushina were dead. Worse still, he had been forbidden from interacting with the baby who he had spent months protecting by watching over his mother. Kakashi only partially obeyed the order. He snuck into the orphanage, face covered with his ANBU mask, and had held the child in his arms for a long time. Cradling the sweet baby boy, rocking back and forth, humming that familiar old tune, and trying not to cry when he finally had to go. He let his head thud back against the door. He had no idea what to do next.

  


Gai’s body was so warm. Kakashi clung to that warmth relentlessly. Tears fell down his face silently. He wept. Nightmares seemed to haunt him every night at the moment. Being in the ANBU only worsened his mental state. He had come back from a particularly stressful mission with no idea what to do next besides collapse into bed to sleep. Gai was there. The Blue Beast had gently guided the teen to wash up, got him to eat a bit of food, and went to bed with his arms wrapped around the other. It was so sweet, so kind, so Gai. Something he didn’t deserve. It made Kakashi’s gut squirm uncomfortably. It was so much more than he was worth. All he had done in his life was kill people and get people killed.

  


Kakashi’s thoughts continued to darken as it suddenly became very hard to breathe. Why was Gai here? Was it out of pity? Would Gai get killed because of him? No, he couldn’t let that happen. Gai would be better off without him. Everyone would be better off without him. It wouldn’t be hard. He took on difficult missions all the time. No one would think twice if he went missing for a few weeks. Ninjas were after him all the time. He could let one finish him off—his thoughts were interrupted when the arms around him squeezed. Kakashi slowly lifted his head to find Gai looking back at him. His face was soft with worry, “It’s ok. You’re ok. Just breathe with me.” Kakashi let his eyes fall shut and focused on breathing in time with Gai.

  


In and out. In and out. In and out. In and out. Kakashi let his head fall against Gai’s shoulder as the other rubbed soothing circles on his back. “You’re safe. I’m here. I won’t let anything happen to you.” The ANBU teen held back a sob and thought, ‘But what about you?’ He pushed his face into the other teen’s neck. He cried into Gai’s warm skin, “I don’t know what to do.” Gai nuzzled his cheek against white hair, “That’s ok. We can figure it out together. I’m not leaving you to handle this alone.” Kakashi allowed himself to freely cry into Gai’s neck until his emotions calmed down. He pulled back to look at his rival. Face red from crying.

  


He twitched when Gai slowly pulled down his mask. He wanted to squirm away at the look his rival gained on his face. It was a mix of wonder, lust, and appreciation. A look he didn’t feel deserving of. Kakashi shifted back before his face was held by a warm hand. Rough fingers trailed down his cheek before pressing on his beauty mark and smoothing over his lips. Kakashi went limp as Gai kissed him. It was a sweet kiss. Soothing and comforting. He gasped, pulling back, and pushed his face back into the crux of the other’s neck. Gai’s steady heartbeat led him to sleep. Kakashi had gotten lost many times in his life, but at least Gai was always there no matter how lost he got.


	5. Prompt: Reversal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi has to be the strong one this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Warnings: None

Kakashi held Gai close to him. Rubbing circles on his back while mumbling soothing words, “Lee will be fine. Tsunade is an excellent healer.” It felt awkward to be the one offering comfort but Gai needed him. Kakashi would take care of him. He rocked back and forth with the other man in his arms. They were in Gai’s apartment after Kakashi had managed to convince him to leave the hospital for the night. What use would he be to Lee if he was too sleep-deprived to do anything? All Kakashi had managed to do was get Gai to eat something before the other collapsed onto him weeping. Choking out words of regret and guilt. That he had failed his precious student.

  


Lee would be having surgery in a few days. The fear that he will never walk or fight again was keeping the jonin awake at night. Gai continued to sob heavily against his lover’s shoulder. Uncertain, Kakashi resorted to the one thing he always did for comfort. He started to softly hum that same old song. The song that was passed from one Hatake to another. Gai didn’t know the tune. He had no idea about the memories attached to it. All he knew was that it was precious to his lover. It was a nice sounding song. Soft, nostalgic, almost like a lullaby. He relaxed as his sobs turned into sniffles. Gai pulled back, rubbing at his tears with a sleeve, before letting out a soft laugh, “You have a nice voice, Kakashi.”

  


The white-haired jonin stared back with a gentle gaze, “So I’ve been told. Feeling any better, turtle?” The Blue Beast nodded, “I do. Thank you.” Kakashi nudged the other man, “Let’s get you in the shower. You reek.” He playfully scrunched up his nose and waved a hand in front of his masked nose. Gai lightly punched his arm with a laugh, “Fine. Will you be joining me, my love?” Kakashi nodded then the pair went to the bathroom together. They undressed at a casual pace. The shower was turned on by Kakashi. As much as he loved Gai, the other man always turned the shower on so scalding water poured out. He didn’t mind the water being hot but not to the point of being painful when you first step in.

  


The water felt soothing on his skin. Kakashi unconsciously kept his one eye shut as Gai stepped in too. They had been fully exposed to each other before, but some habits never died out. Moving swiftly, he swapped their positions so Gai was standing under the water more. He needed the shower more. Kakashi leaned over and poured some shampoo into his hand. He rubbed them together before reaching out and running his hands through slick black hair. His movements were a little awkward. It was usually Gai washing Kakashi in the shower since his lover enjoyed pampering him at every chance. Well, maybe this was a sign that the Copy Ninja needed to pamper his partner more. He made a silent vow to do so in the future.

  


Kakashi made sure to scratch his nails against Gai’s scalp the way he would when he was casual messing with the other’s hair. It clearly felt nice from the way he sighed happily and melted into the touch. The jonin washed out his lover’s hair and repeated the process with some conditioner. Gai turned around after the second washing. He wrapped his arms around his love, “You’re being so sweet to me. What did I do to deserve this special treatment?” Kakashi stared back with an affectionate look, “You were yourself, Gai. You’ve always been there for me. I want to be there for you too.” His face fell into a flat expression, “Don’t cry, turtle.” Gai held back manly tears with a huge sniff.

  


Gai squeezed his love tightly in his arms, “Oh, Kakashi! I’m so happy that you’re being so open with me!” The shorter man glanced away with a slightly embarrassed look, “Ok, yeah, I know. Let me go, turtle. I’m not done yet.” The brute of a man gave one last bone-crushing squeeze before releasing his love. Kakashi took a rag in his hand and began to wash Gai’s body. He rubbed the rag against tan skin until it was covered in soap. He also snuck down and stole a quick grab of his lover’s muscular ass. Gai chuckled but didn’t move until the other was finished cleaning him. Then, he grabbed the rag and eagerly washed his eternal love’s body. Kakashi sighed as he sunk into the attention. He felt a little greedy, but this was the only thing he allows himself to be greedy with.

  


Gai’s hand trailed down his love’s back after putting the rag away. Kakashi’s skin was oddly pristine. It was very pale and smooth. Gai leaned forward to place a kiss on Kakashi’s shoulder. He held their bodies close together in an embrace. Gai’s lips grazed Kakashi’s ear, “I love you so much, Kakashi.” The white-haired man pressed back into the embrace. His eyes drifted shut with a small smile. He tapped out in morse code ‘I love you too, turtle’ on Gai’s wrist. It made that usual bright smile come back and a kiss was pressed to his throat. They stayed like that. Kakashi being Gai’s support and comfort instead of the other way around.


	6. Prompt: Masks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gai gets to see Kakashi's face for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T  
> Warnings: Mild sexual content

Kakashi has worn a mask religiously since he was a little boy. Initially, it was to keep his sensitive nose from getting overwhelmed and to hide the fangs that didn’t quite fit his face as a kid. Now, it acted as a barrier. It gave him some distance from others. Made hiding his true emotions and vulnerability easier. But you can’t kiss anyone with a mask on your face. It made him feel bad because the only kisses he’s given Gai has been through the mask. It was that bad feeling that made Kakashi decide to finally let someone see his face after years of hiding it. He invited his boyfriend over to his apartment a few days earlier for a date. Tonight, tonight was the night. He’d show Gai his face. Anxiety brewed in his gut.

  


What if Gai didn’t like how his face looked? What if the fangs put Gai off? Would he push Kakashi away in disgust? What if—Kakashi jerked when a loud knocking rattled him out of his thoughts. He stood up and went over to the door. Gai’s bright smiling face and an aggressive hug greeted him. The door ended up shut in between Kakashi getting crushed in an embrace and the pair stumbling onto the couch to sit together. Gai sat back with that bright grin still on his face, “So, what did you want to do, my love?” Kakashi twitched a bit at the nickname, unuse to a sweet petname, and curled in on himself. He didn’t say anything but simply grabbed Gai’s hand and brought it up to his face.

  


He hooked some of the other’s fingers into his mask before dropping his own onto his knee. Kakashi sat silently and waited with anxiety welling up in his chest. Gai looked surprised and a bit concerned, “Kakashi…are you sure?” The white-haired teen glanced away, “I won’t be if you wait any longer.” Gai pinched the fabric between his fingers, “Right, I’m going to pull the mask down now.” The green-clad teen pulled the mask down slowly. His eyes watching carefully for any signs of discomfort as the fabric slipped down his love’s face. Kakashi looked back into those dark eyes. The steadiness in Gai’s eyes provided some comfort. He felt himself relax a bit even as his mask slipped away.

  


The first thing that got exposed was his nose. Kakashi twitched as all the smells in the room became stronger. It was slightly overwhelming due to the rarity of his nose being exposed. Next was his lips which he kept stubbornly sealed together. Gai didn’t need to see his fangs just yet. Finally, the fabric dropped down to expose his chin, beauty mark, and neck. Gai let go of the mask and just stared. Kakashi curled into himself more and more the longer his rival stared at his face. It was freaking the teen out. What was Gai thinking? Gai felt his jaw drop. His love’s face was stunning. A nicely shaped nose, soft white skin, plump lips, a dark beauty mark, and an oddly soft jawline that fit his rival so well.

  


Why would his love hide such a gorgeous face? How could he not stare? Still, Kakashi’s hand uneasily crept up towards his face, “…Gai?” The soft, anxious tone of his love’s voice snapped the teen out of his staring. Gai’s hand reached up and cradled that soft cheek in his large hand, “Why would you hide your face? You’re so handsome.” Kakashi’s face flushed and he looked away. He felt painfully exposed without the mask, “My nose is sensitive. Smells can get overwhelming sometimes.” He looked back to see that Gai was staring at his mouth with a heavy blush, “Gai?” Gai visibly swallows, “You, uh, have fangs.” Kakashi smacked his hands over his mouth. Shit, he forgot about his fangs. He winced, “Sorry, I know they’re ugly—” Gai cut him off, “I like them.”

  


Pale hands were tugged away to re-expose the sharp canines. Gai carefully touched Kakashi’s lips with his fingers, “It’s not fair how handsome you are.” The teen looked away with a blush, “I think you’re much more handsome than me.” He looked back when he heard loud sniffs. His eye went half-lidded at the sight of Gai holding back tears with a big smile on his face. A soft smile curled onto his face, “There’s no need to cry, turtle.” Tears only fell harder, “Y-your smile is *sniff* so b-beautiful!” Gai shoved their faces together in a sweet nuzzle. There wasn’t going to be any way Kakashi could get the blush off his face with how sweet his turtle was being. His smile turned a bit shy, “Ok, that’s enough Gai.”

  


Gai pulled back and turned his attention back to his love’s lips. He dragged his thumb along a plump lower lip, “Can I kiss you, Kashi?” Kakashi jerked back in surprise, “Oh…s-sure.” He relaxed into the hold on his face. Gai leaned forward with eager excitement in his eyes. The kiss was clumsy. It spoke of inexperience, but Gai made sure to include plenty of passion. He put his all into it like everything else he did. It made Kakashi hum into the kiss. Their lips slid together. A hand slipped into spiky white hair. Gai kept leaning forward until they eventually toppled so that Kakashi was on his back with Gai hovering over him. This was so nice. It felt good to be close to someone else. Kakashi smiled a bit at the gentle hands pressing into his skin.

  


Gai couldn’t help himself. He pressed kisses against the newly exposed skin. His love was so amazing! His skin was so soft against his lips. It was a rare treat that his eternal love decided to be this vulnerable. So, Gai would make the absolute most of it. He eagerly kissed his love’s lips, cheeks, forehead, and neck. Kakashi let out an embarrassing noise when his neck was kissed. That made Gai pause and look up to make sure that the other was ok. Kakashi’s face was flushed and he couldn’t meet his boyfriend’s eyes, “You can keep going, turtle.” Gai smiled and dove back down. The mask would cover up anything he left. He kissed, sucked, and bit at that soft neck. He drunk in the soft noises coming from his love.

  


Kakashi had a nice voice. Gai could feel a hardness pressing against his thigh from where he was positioned. He leaned back with a grin. He cradled his face with care, “You’re gorgeous, Kashi. Can I keep going?” That lovely smile curled onto Kakashi’s face, “Sure, Gai.” The smile fell, “I might need to put my mask back on soon. I feel so naked without it…” Gai leaned up to place a peck on those plump lips, “Whatever you want, my love.” Kakashi smiled back, “Thank you, turtle.”


	7. Bonus Prompt: Students

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi and Gai being good teachers. And Gai loving Kakashi finally dropping his guard a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Warnings: Mild description of injury

Kakashi’s pups could be such a pain. He knew full damn well that they were following him around. For what reason, he had no idea. They had become clingier after he had gotten severely injured on a mission. It was obvious that something was on their minds. Naruto was the worst as he would literally cling to his sensei’s legs. Sakura came up with excuse after excuse to follow him around. Even Sasuke was a bit clingier as he’d randomly show up to location where Kakashi happened to be. It was a tad exhausting. Kakashi vaguely wondered if Gai ever had to deal with this. One of his fellow jonin pointed out that maybe they were doing this because they were scared that he’d vanish if they didn’t attach themselves to him all day. All he knew was that it was annoying.

  


Gai loved his students. It wasn’t something he hid. But they could be clingy at times. Lee was especially clingy as he had no other family to go to. Right now, all of his students were being oddly clingy. What he managed to get out of them was that they were concerned because his body had taken a bad beating on their last mission. As sweet as this concern was, he couldn’t deny that he wanted some time alone. Or at least alone with Kakashi. His eternal love didn’t act like they were dating if he wasn’t certain that they were alone. He understood that anxiety, but he also really missed his Kakashi. He had to come up with some way to get the other jonin alone and get those walls to come down for a bit.

  


They went on a mission alone together. Or at least that was the plan. Both Kakashi’s pups and Gai’s ducklings followed them. On a high rank mission and got caught by the enemy. Gai hadn’t noticed. Kakashi only did when his mask fell down from his nose and he caught his pups’ smell. As annoyed as he was at being interrupted, Gai couldn’t deny how happy he felt at the concern in his love’s eyes. Any irritation fell away when their students cried out in pain. Kakashi leapt at the attackers while Gai checked to see if anyone was injured. All six genin had visible wounds, but nothing serious. Gai turned with a serious expression to face the enemies once Kakashi fell back at his side.

  


Anger waved off both men. How dare these miserable little worms hurt their students. The fight didn’t last long. With both their tempers flared, Kakashi and Gai were fighting ferociously. In their fog of anger, they both got injured. Gai had some bruises and gashes all over his hands, arms, and legs. Kakashi was worse off having been more reckless. He had a long, furiously bleeding gash along his side and a reopened stab wound in his upper chest. Gai gathered his student close in a hug as the three apologized for following him. He patted them with a bright smile, “While I’m not happy that you followed us, I know you just were worried about me. Let’s head back so I can patch you guys up.” Neji’s gaze stopped Gai as the team looked over to what he was looking at.

  


Kakashi wasn’t known as a soft or affectionate man by most of the public. In fact, most students knew him as being a cruel teacher. So, the sight before them was downright bizarre. The jonin had his team in a tight hug. He was nuzzling against them and mumbling out soft words. He spent time pressing his covered lips against each student’s forehead as they clung to him and cried. Gai couldn’t help smiling. He knew that deep down Kakashi cared. His love had started affectionately referring to his team as his pups. Gai encouraged his team to move forward, “Kakashi, how about we go back to my place and get these rascals patched up.” Kakashi nodded before standing up.

  


Gai was slightly surprised that he allowed Naruto to cling to his neck and carried the boy. Sakura and Sasuke clung to one leg each as they walked back. It was adorable to see his love being so soft. His own team was a lot less clingy but still stayed by his side. By the time they got back to Gai’s apartment it was dark out. Kakashi could feel his pups slowing down from exhaustion. He urged them along at least until they got into the living room. For once, the white-haired jonin was glad that his partner kept an unholy number of pillows and blankets in his home. None of his pups had stopped crying. Not even Sasuke was able to stop the silent tears. He ushered them to sit on one of the pillow mounds.

  


Gai’s team followed to sit down too. Once he made sure all the kids were settled, Kakashi went to get the first aid kit. Meanwhile, Gai went into the small kitchen area to make everyone dinner. All he ended up doing was reheating a batch of curry he had in the fridge, but no one seemed to mind. As the students ate, Kakashi and Gai patched up their respective teams. Kakashi let Gai patch him up after his pups whined at him to get his wounds taken care of. Gai himself wouldn’t really need anything except a few bandages here and there. It was nice to see his love being a bit sweeter to his students. It wasn’t easy to get the man’s walls to fall after all. This day wasn’t turning out so bad.

  


Gai chuckled as his students fell asleep around him. Neji curled up at his right side. Lee curled up at his left side. Tenten fell asleep behind him on his couch. The chuckle turned into muffled loud laughter as he looked at his love. Kakashi’s students were literally on top of him. Naruto had his face shoved into the man’s neck and fell asleep clinging to him like that. Sasuke fell asleep clutching Kakashi’s pant leg. Feigning disinterest when he was actually very concerned. Sakura fell asleep clinging to one of Kakashi’s arms. It was an adorable sight. His love lightly glared at him as he laughed, “Pains in my ass, all of you.” Gai stopped chuckling to smile instead, “Yeah, but you love me and your students.”

  


Kakashi gave an exaggerated sigh as his free hand unconsciously started to rub up and down Naruto’s back. His head fell back to rest against a pillow, “I have no clue why I do.” Gai looked at where Naruto was pressed against the man’s chest, “It’s good to see you acting this way, my love.” Kakashi let his hand fall to rub against Sasuke’s head, “I know. You were right. I like having my pups around.” Gai reached out to grasp Kakashi’s free hand, “It suits you, Kashi.” Kakashi raised an eyebrow, “Don’t go telling people. I have a reputation to uphold.” Gai kissed the hand in his grasp, “Of course, my dearest rival.” They ended up falling asleep with their hands clasped together. Maybe tonight wasn’t such a bust after all.


	8. Prompt: Gai's Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi plans a surprise for Gai.
> 
> Some inspiration came from the song "Monster" from Adventure Time: Obsidian  
> Bit of a songfic combined with a personal headcanon that Kakashi can sing pretty well and knows how/can easily learn to play instruments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Warnings: None

Today was Gai’s birthday. Kakashi had a special plan in mind. He wanted to make this day special. For it to work, he had actually gone to Gai’s three bratlings to get their help. Lee and Tenten were visibly excited to help. Neji was excited too, but he kept it under a calm façade. The brats would drag their sensei around for the first part of the day while Kakashi got his surprise set up. Then, he would swoop in and take Gai away for their date night together. Hopefully, everything would go as planned. Kakashi smoothed down his shirt. Anxiety swelled up in his mind. Despite being together for years now, doing any larger gestures still made the Copy Ninja skittish. He really hoped everything went well.

  


Gai was having a great birthday. His precious students had come and spent most of the day with him. They had come to train with him in the morning, cooked lunch for him, played games, and went out to dinner with him. He loved his students. However, Gai missed his eternal love. He hadn’t seen Kakashi for most of the day. It was unlikely that he forgot what day it was today. Kakashi seemed almost paranoid about forgetting it and upsetting the other jonin. Yet, he hadn’t shown up at all. Gai masked his disappointment from his students and tried to focus on what was happening. He still found himself keeping an eye out for the Copy Ninja. Neji and Tenten noticed but just smiled to each other. The surprise would come soon enough.

  


Team Gai were walking down the street at dusk when Kakashi appeared in front of them. The Blue Beast brightened up as soon as he saw his partner, “Kakashi! Where have ya’ been?” Kakashi gave his usual close-eyed smile, “Sorry, I had to do a few things.” He glanced at the three bratlings before giving a short nod. Neji, Tenten, and Lee nodded back before darting away. Gai could only be confused by the disappearance for a few moments before he was being tugged away by Kakashi. The feeling of Kakashi’s warm fingers wrapped around his wrist distracted him from his confusion. A softer smile quirked onto Gai’s face, “Where are you taking me, my rival?” Kakashi smiled under his mask, “You’ll see, Gai.”

  


Kakashi’s apartment was never a homey place. He was there so little that it was kept highly minimalistic with only essentials around. So, it took Gai by surprise when he saw a few lit candles around the room with a blanket on the ground that had some sake and sweets sitting on it. Kakashi smiled at the look of wonder on his partner’s face, “Sit down, turtle.” Gai walked carefully to avoid knocking over any candles as he went to settle down on the blanket. Tears sprung into his eyes as his eternal love sat down across from him and removed that usually ever-present mask, “Kakashi, this is amazing.” That soft smile made Gai’s gut flutter, “Happy birthday, Gai, go ahead and eat up.”

  


Gai eagerly dug into the sweets and sake. Kakashi sipped his own alcohol much more slowly. Amusement played across his face as his partner got progressively more intoxicated. It was the man’s birthday. He was allowed to have fun. Gai sighed happily as he relaxed on the blanket, “Thanks, Kakashi. Ya’ didn’t have to do this.” The Copy Ninja smiled back with a fond expression, “No, but you deserve to have a fun birthday.” Leaning forward with ease, Kakashi placed a sweet kiss on Gai’s lips. He put his hands on top of broad shoulders to keep the other man’s balance as they continued to exchange soft kisses. Gai laughed into the kisses, “This has been a fun birthday.” He rubbed his nose against the other man’s cheek.

  


Kakashi chuckled at the gentle affection. He pulled back a bit with an anxious smile, “I have another surprise for you.” Gai leaned back with an excited look on his face, “Really? What is it?” Kakashi reached out to steady his partner as the other man practically vibrated with excitement. He held back a laugh, “You’ll see, turtle.” He reached out and pulled out a stringed instrument. Gai stared as Kakashi adjusted himself before starting to play. Dark eyes blinked slowly as a quiet melodic voice sang out, “I know we’ll never grow old together. Cause you’ll never grow old to me. You’re the pink in my cheeks and I’m scared cause that means I’m a little bit soft. So, don’t beat yourself up, honey. It wasn’t just the sun I was hiding from. We were messed up kids who taught ourselves how to live. So scared that I’m not good enough. I’ve always felt like a monster.”

  


Gai frowned at that. Kakashi’s voice was light even as some sadness went across his face, “Long before I was big. Only seen as a monster. Just say that I’m used to it. I grew tough cause love it only hurt me back. But loving you is a good problem to have. And I’m used to that, but I could get used to this.” Gai shifted so the leftover dishes weren’t separating them anymore. His love’s voice filled the small space, “For the record, I stole your sweater cause I just wanted you close to me. I thought shaky knees only meant I was weak. Just a little too soft. So don’t beat yourself up, honey. It wasn’t just the sun I was hiding from. We were messed up kids who taught ourselves to live. So scared that I’m not good enough. I’ve always felt like a monster long before I was big.”

  


The pair had unconsciously started to shift closer together, “Only seen as a monster. Just say that I’m used to it. I grew tough cause love it only hurt me back. But loving you is a good problem to have. And I’m used to that, but I could get used to this. Hmmmm, yeah, I’m used to that. But I could get used to this. And we’ll never grow old together ‘cause you’ll never grow old to me. You’re the pink in my cheeks and I love that it means I’m a little bit soft. You’re the pink in my cheeks and I love that it means I’m a little bit soft.” Kakashi twitched in his spot as he finished. It’d been a long time since he had sung in front of anyone let alone a song for someone.

  


What he didn’t expect was to get bowled over in a tight hug. Gai sobbed into his shoulder, “Kakashi! That was so sweet! You have an amazing voice, my love! I could feel your emotions as you sang.” Kakashi smiled lightly. He still couldn’t directly say ‘I love you’ to Gai. At least it seemed that he conveyed how he felt in the song. He hugged his partner back tightly, “I’m glad you enjoyed your gift, turtle.” Gai pulled back and hastily wiped away any leftover tears. He smiled brightly at his love, “I love you, Kakashi.” The Copy Ninja gave his own small grin. This surprise went better than he thought it would. Then again, Gai loved every gift he’d ever given him. Just like he loved every part of Kakashi.


End file.
